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Fall Television Preview:
What the big five have in store for us…
Reunion (FOX, Thursdays 9:00-10:00)
Don't you wish your high school reunions were this murderously fun?
The lives of six friends play out in one-year increments as they being their journey in 1986 as high school graduates, and end up reunited at a present day funeral. The central character who bites the dust, and how said dust is bit remains a mystery that will wrap up as the show progresses, but it's a sure bet that this will be drawn out for all it's worth (after all, once the show completes twenty episodes, the concept is basically done). We open with Will (Will Estes, "American Dreams"), who is riding on an athletic scholarship; Craig (Sean Faris, "Life as We Know It"), who is going off to an Ivy Leage school with girlfriend Samantha (Alexa Davalos); Jenna (Amanda Righetti, "The O.C.") aspires to be an actress while Aaron (Dave Annable) secretly pines for her; and Carla (Chyler Lee, "The Practice") has to decide between her family and friends. Week by week, each character will age one year until the mysterious death is resolved.The Unit (CBS, Midseason)
Scott Foley, jealous that J. J. Abrams never once invited him to guest star on "Alias," decides to stick it to him and ex Jennifer Garner by starring in his very own espionage show, The Unit. Foley is just one of several members of a special undercover unit who travel around the world engaging in classified, dangerous missions. Dennis Haysbert ("24"), Robert Patrick ("The X-Files"), and Regina Taylor (Miss Congeniality 2) also join Foley in risking their lives from week to week.What About Brian (ABC, Mondays 10:00-11:00)
At 34, Brian (Barry Watson) is the last single guy in his group. His friends have coupled off and are busy getting married, starting families, or trying to rekindle a passionless marriage. Is this Brian's last chance for love? From the producers of "Lost" and "Alias" comes this gripping drama about life, friendship, and…zzz. In the very least, this show is giving Watson an age-appropriate chance to redeem himself after the career shame that was "7th Heaven." Also look for Rosanna Arquette, who plays one of Brian's friends, and Amy Jo Johnson, whom I've been biased against ever since she appeared on "Felicity" and stole Ben and made me listen to her crappy music.If You Think Aliens Are Among Us (Or, If You Really Miss the X-Files)…
Invasion (ABC, Wednesday 10:00-11:00)
According to Invasion, aliens are body snatching us "one neighbour at a time." Not only are aliens responsible for crop circles and cow violations, they're apparently also causing our natural disasters. Enter Eddie Cibrian ("Third Watch," and thankfully retired as member of the fantastically bad 3 Deep) as Russell Varon, a U.S. Park Ranger who tries to keep things under control when a hurricane hits his small town and deposits his missing ex-wife naked in a lake. Russell thinks there's something fishy going on. Is he onto something? Not if his arch nemesis, Sheriff Underlay (William Fitchner), has something to say about it.
I hope they come to my town soon. To exercise my demon of...lust!
Supernatural (WB, Tuesdays 9:00-10:00)
WB supporting cast alumni Jared Padelecki ("Gilmore Girls") and Jensen Ackles ("Smallville") finally get their own show as brothers who travel cross country in their '69 Chevy Impala (which another site lists as a '67 Ford Impala - and since I don't know anything about cars I don't feel very free to care one way or another) to carry out their missing father's mission of ridding the world of supernatural forces, the very same ones that were responsible for their mother's death twenty years ago. If this sounds familiar, it should, as executive producer McG is going for a blatant "X-Files" "homage." Preliminary screenings warn that this show is less about the spooky ambiance and more about the gore, so watch with caution.Surface (NBC, Mondays 8:00-9:00)
If you've seen the early teasers on NBC, then you're familiar with the premise of this show: strange sea creatures have been appearing all over the world, and one just has to wonder, are they aliens? I mean, when you put them in a tank with other fish, they totally kill the fish and then break the tank. So of course they are! Nevertheless, dispatched to this case is oceanographer Lake Bell, who has lots of time now that she's been let go from "Boston Legal"; she gets some help from Jay Ferguson, Rade Sherbedzija, Carter Jenkins, and Leighton Meester.Threshold (CBS, Fridays 9:00-10:00)
Carla Gugino, Charles S. Dutton, and Lt. Commander Data (okay, Bret Spiner, who already dealt with aliens in Independence Day and lost badly) are commissioned to investigate an alien aircraft that has landed on Earth. Operation: Threshold is underway, and it is up to this group of elite physicists, language/communication experts, and U.S. Navy covert operatives to find out what is really among us. Last Status: CBS has moved this show to Tuesdays at 10:00 PM.If You Miss Sex & The City…
Hot Properties (ABC, Fridays 9:30-10:00)
Set in trendy Manhattan, this comedy follows the lives of four career women as they juggle the real estate market and their complicated relationships. There's Chloe (Nicole Sullivan, "MADtv"), a self-improvement junkie who is single, insecure, and neurotic; Ava (Gail O'Grady, "American Dreams") is a Samantha archetype in every way - she's forty-ish, well aware of her sexuality, and newly married to a twenty-five year old stud; Lola (Sofia Vergara) has been married for ten years and comes to the realization that her husband is gay; and Emerson (Audra Blaser), a rich, spoiled woman who figures out that her impending marriage isn't mean to be but a career in real estate is. This show borrows heavily from "Designing Women," "Golden Girls," and "Sex & The City," so everyone should have something to choose from.Kitchen Confidential (FOX, Mondays 8:30-9:00)
From the mind of Darren Star ("Sex & The City") comes this single-camera comedy (think "Malcolm in the Middle" or "Scrubs") based on chef Anthony Bourdain's autobiography. Bradley Cooper is Jack Bourdain (because all the writers could come up with is an original first name but not a last name), an up-and-coming chef who thinks he's a rock star and gets tangled up in booze, women, and drugs. He's given one more chance to redeem himself with a job offer at a top New York restaurant. The catch, because this has to somehow make sense: he has to staff the whole restaurant in two days. And then, just like Armageddon, we get the montage of rag-tag friends that Jack enlists, which include Owain Yeoman, Nicholas Brendon ("Buffy the Vampire Slayer"), John Francis Daley, Jaime King (Sin City), and Bonnie Sommerville as Mimi, the owner's no-nonsense daughter. John Cho (Harold & Kumar), who made an appearance in early press pictures but was mysteriously Photoshopped out of the NBC website, might also star (at least in spirit).
I was wrong. No more Laura on the WB site.
Related (WB, Wednesdays 9:00-10:00)
The wonderful woman who brought us He's Just Not That Into You (Liz Tucillo, "one of today's most brutally honest writers about relationships," if by "honest" you mean "archaic") teams up with Marta Kaufman ("Friends") to take over the world, one clichéd sex joke at a time. This wonder duo has set their sights on a dramedy about the Sorelli sisters, four young women living the life in the Big Apple. Stars Jennifer Esposito, Lizzie Caplan, Laura Breckenridge, and Kiele Sanchez (taking over for Laura San Giacomo, who was recast at the eleventh hour but still enjoys her picture on the WB site).If You Were Just Thinking that You Haven't Seen Henry Winkler In a While…
Out of Practice (CBS, Mondays 9:30-10:00)
The team of "Frasier" brings us another sitcom psychologist, but this time it's much younger Ben (Christopher Gorham,"Medical Investigation"), a marriage counselor who has a harder, wackier time dealing with his dysfunctional family than he does patients. This outlandish family includes matriarch Stockard Channing ("The West Wing"), a surgeon whose career has eclipsed that of her husband's, played by a secretary-schlepping Henry Winkler (Fonzie!), sister Regina (Paula Marshall, "Spin City"), a lesbian ER doctor, and older brother Oliver (Ty Burrell, Dawn of the Dead), a plastic surgeon who is probably sleazy because they usually are.If You Can't Get Enough of Lawyers and Their Wacky Ways…
Close to Home (CBS, Tuesdays 10:00-11:00)
Show creator Jerry Bruckheimer (who, given his prolific career, must be a vampire that never sleeps), brings us this lawyerly drama about Annabeth Chase (Jennifer Finnigan), a prosecutor with a perfect conviction rate who is the granddaughter of Perry Mason. Okay, the last part I made up. But she does take some time off to raise her first child. She's watched television enough to know that suburban towns often house the most creepy, murderous people in the world, so when she returns to work she sets her sights on getting rid of the scum in her small town.In Justice (ABC, Midseason)
From the producers of "life as we know it" comes this ripped-from-the-headlines drama about a group of lawyers who work for the "Justice Project," which sounds more like a superhero name than a non-profit organization dedicated to overturning wrongful convictions. Kyle MacLauchlan is David Swayne, smarmy litigator with egotistical motives. Luckily, straight-laced partner Charles Gonti (Jason O'Mara), ex-cop turned investigator, will keep him in check. You just know this juxtaposition in personality would make these two hate each other, but in television land, they're like Bert and Ernie. Last Status: This show does exist! And I finally saw a promo during a sit-down with "Desperate Housewives." Let's see how long this baby lasts.Just Legal (WB, Mondays 9:00-10:00)
They say that for every failed attempt at entertainment, a man must produce a hit…or so they would of Jerry Bruckheimer, who has four new vehicles this year, plus about twenty returning shows. So he's either a humanitarian who wants to give the world the gift of entertainment, or he's still paying off his bills for King Arthur. This latest installment in Bruckheimer land introduces us to Skip Ross (Jay Baruchel, "Undeclared"), a cherub-faced legal prodigy who passes the bar at eighteen and finds that no legal firm in their right minds will hire him. Enter Grant Cooper (Don Johnson), who plays an ambulance chaser to the tee. They pair up to fight legal cases and to learn a thing or two from each other, like how to love. And how to get better agents. Last Status: "Just Legal" was just not good enough, so WB stuck "Related" into its timeslot.If Watching CSI Four Nights a Week Still Isn't Enough…
Bones (FOX, Tuesdays 8:00-9:00)
When a body has been destroyed…when your garden-variety team of forensic scientists are stumped…when standard identification procedures are useless…who you going to call? FOX's answer is Dr. Temperance Brennan (Emily Deschanel, Zooey's sister), a forensic anthropologist who teams up with reluctant Special Agent Seeley Booth (David Boreanaz, "Angel") to fight crime. He's reluctant, you see, because he mistrusts science and scientists, although it's not clear what those two things ever did to him. Also on board at the Jeffersonian's Medico-Legal Lab are Agnela Montenegro (Michaela Conlin), Dr. Jack Hodgins (T. J. Thyne), and Temperance's boss, Dr. Daniel Goodman (Jonathan Adams).
Meet Sean Cole. He has a score to settle. With shoddy evidence keeping!
The Evidence (ABC, Midseason)
As ABC notes, The Evidence isn't your typical crime drama. For starters, at the beginning of every episode viewers are privy to a videotaped evidence log, which allows them to play along with leads Nicky Katt (Sean Cole), Orlando Jones (Cayman Bishop), and Martin Landau (Dr. Sol Gol, which really sounds more like a rejected James Bond character than a medical examiner). As far as storyline goes, it's clear that Sean has had a tragic past: when he loses his wife to murder, the evidence to her case is accidentally destroyed. This blow leads him to exact revenge by…preserving evidence in a timely manner? Making sure he labels things clearly? Always locking up? If it's wrong that I laughed at this weak plot twist, then I don't want to be right.If You Loved Dharma & Greg…
Criminal Minds (CBS, Wednesday 9:00-10:00)
Then you'll love Criminal Minds, which stars Thomas Gibson, who played hoity-toity Greg, along with Mandy Patikin, Shemar Moore, Lola Glaudini, and Matthew Gubler. Not only do they have good genes in common, but they're also profilers (or "mind hunters") in the FBI Behavioural Analysis Unit. They do a whole lot of profiling and catch really bad people.Everything I Know About Men (CBS, Midseason)
Unfortunately, Jenna Elfman, who played zany Dharma, only gets a mid-season deal with CBS as Bex Atwell, a single woman searching for love, job satisfaction, and a relationship with her estranged father, played by Dabney Coleman. Bradley Smith, her on-again/off-again boyfriend, and her boss, Hugh Bonneville, add fuel to her already complicated (but in a funny way) life.
[ Sweaty prison dramas, more reality to keep us real, and saying good-bye. Part III of the preview. ]