| |
Diamonds Are A Boy's Best Friend:
Get your bling on...
FOR YOUR INFORMATION
Ladies, am I alone in feeling that grills are probably the ugliest and most unnecessary pieces of jewelry for men? Oh, you’re not sure what grills are? They are removable teeth plates in gold, silver or platinum and adorned with gems (usually diamonds). Yes, jewelry is not just for your neck, wrist or ears anymore. The current trend for teenage boys (and men in their early 20s and beyond, and also a growing number of females) is to shower themselves in beautiful baubles.
I remember when old skool rappers sparkled from their gold teeth and flaunted their bigass gold rope chains (think Flavor Flav and Slick Rick). I used to think that that was excessive! Now, the new wave of rappers have taken an old skool tradition and given it a new spin. They’ve taken their love for tacky jewelry one step further and added an offensive amount of bling to their pearly whites. Instead of having plain gold teeth like the rappers of yore, rappers today, and anyone else for that matter, can have their name, logos, or a custom design all over their fronts.
Maybe I’m getting too old, but I can’t fathom why men would want to have diamonds plastered to their teeth. It doesn’t look sexy and it ain’t attractive. Girls are not going to like you because you’re swimming in diamonds; they should like you for you. If they like you for your jewelry, that’s not the type of girl that you want! (Maybe you need to listen to Kanye West’s “Gold Digger” one more time!)
What happens if you swallow a gem? Would I cut my lip if I kissed a guy with diamonds all over his teeth? Okay, I’m being stupid, but I still think that spending that much money for something that won’t even help straighten your teeth is crazy (I had braces when I was thirteen, and that was money well spent!).
Some say that wearing fronts can be a bit unsanitary. Some grill wearers take them off to eat, and then shove them into their pocket. When they are finished eating and want to flash their million-dollar smile, they will reach into their pocket and put their grills back into their mouth. Now it’s covered in lint and all the other filthy things that are in pockets. Not very hygienic.
I almost feel sorry for the guys who are lining up for their customized grills. Fellas are throwing down mad cash for their jewelry, but their dentists and the online grill companies are the ones smiling all the way to the bank. The cost of getting grills can run from $30.00 for a cap to an unbelievable $3,000 for a mouth full of gold. Dammmn! The trend will probably be out in a few years (hopefully) and these misguided guys will be stuck with a grand worth of tarnished jewelry. Psst…save your money for something else!!!
I guess that’s why Paul Wall has no choice but to both wear and sell them. He needs a damn good way to support his very expensive habit.
Speaking of the People’s Champ, Paul Wall, he is one of the main reasons why I chose to write this article. He is featured on one of the worst, if not THE worst songs of 2005, "Grillz" (actually, Dem Franchize Boyz take that award with "I Think They Like Me"). Nelly and Paul Wall rap about gettin’ their shine on in their ornately jeweled teeth. Can you believe that grownass men are talking about how much their ice sparkles? Not only does this song make me hate grills even more, but Nelly and Paul Wall come off very ignorant and materialistic.
I’m sure that you can tell from my ranting and raving that I absolutely hate everything about gold/silver/platinum teeth. They are a little garish and way too flamboyant. My message to all the fellas that are thinking of flossin’ in gaudy jewelry, here’s a piece of advice…don’t do it!! ¤ Michelle
Psst! Some sites offer a starter kit (www.goldteeth.com) which allows you to make an impression of your teeth. Once you’ve made your impression, you send it back to them, and they will create your customized grills.