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This & That:
Happygrrls dating profile, I Got Coffee Breath, and more...
Happygrrls Dating Profile
ROLL CALL
BABY BABY BABY
Name: Phan
Dating Status: Taken.
Likes: Someone fun and down to earth.
Dislikes: Dishonesty (to me and themselves).
Turn Ons: Athletic, clean shaven…
What Makes Me A Good Catch: I'm cute and lovable.
Song That Best Sums Up My Dating Style: "A Groovy Kind of Love," Phil Collins.
Weirdest Compliment/Dis That I've Received: "You have a good body for a Chinese girl." (If you can call that a compliment.)
Best Gift A Guy Has Given Me: Carrot sticks (my boyfriend surprised me with some fresh cut carrot sticks after finding out that I liked munching on them).
Favourite Date Spot: Chillin' at a nice coffee shop or cruisin' around town.Name: Michelle
Dating Status: Single and looking???
Likes: Deep men who can make me laugh.
Dislikes: Wannabe playas with too much bling bling.
Turn Ons: Cornrows, dreads, goatees.
What Makes Me a Good Catch: I'm funny, smart and I got cool hair.
Song That Best Sums Up My Dating Style: "Dilemma," Nelly featuring Kelly Rowland.
Weirdest Compliment/Dis That I've Received: "You're cute, but you're too short." (Hey, I'm 5'1"!)
Best Gift a Guy Has Given Me: I totally cherish the take out bag that an ex gave me from my favourite restaurant, Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles.
Favourite Date Spot: My car.Name: Christine
Dating Status: Single, single, single.
Likes: Funny men who like to karaoke.
Dislikes: Liars, cheaters, hypocrites - basically anyone like my ex-boyfriend.
Turn Ons: Suits, musicians/artists, ham.
What Makes Me a Good Catch: I'm easygoing, funny, and know how to hold my liquor (most of the time).
Song That Best Sums Up My Dating Style: "Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover," Sophie B. Hawkins
Weirdest Compliment/Dis That I've Received: "Your hair is a lovely shade of orange." (It is not - orange, I mean.)
Best Gift a Guy Has Given Me: Everything an ex gave me, including the gift of love. Ha! That was really corny.
Favourite Date Spot: Any place that involves liquor and dim lighting.I Got Coffee Breath (v. Male Trouble)
In the last issue, we focused on Michelle's obsession with her hair. This month, we're going to focus on her second obsession - men. And who isn't intrigued by men? The way they act, the things they say, the way they stubbornly eat the rest of the pasta they ordered just to prove a point, even though they hate every bite. It's enough to make your head explode. Let's take a look at some back issues of IGCB, Michelle's zine from back in the day, to see what she had to say about this.The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same
(Issue 21, 3rd Anniversary Issue)What I have noticed (and I'm sure that you have noticed this as well) is that my 'zine always contains these 2 topics: men and my hair. It's almost shocking the amount of time and effort that I have put into talking about the men that I like, the men that I have dated, and the men that I have broken up with. The same can be said about my hair.
Men, Brothas, Fellas, Males...
(Issue 21, 3rd Anniversary Issue)As stated on the previous page, my articles tend to focus on men because everything they do and say never ceases to amaze me. One day about a month ago, I was a little tired from work and I didn't have the strength to talk to anyone, but this stupid thing that this guy told me made me laugh. Check this out…
As I was walking towards a nearby café, I was approached by a young man. He looked at me and asked if I remembered him. I said no, and then I began to walk away. He then followed me and asked me if I was sure. I studied his face again, and then I was positive that I had never seen this brotha before. But before I could tell him I had no idea who the hell he was, he said, "Don't you remember me from your dream last night?" As foolish as he sounded, I couldn't help but laugh. Brothaman made me laugh. Thanks.
A Short Note on Trini Men
(Issue 16, The Noir Issue)First of all, they are not shy!!! They are not afraid to tell you what they are thinking. Sometimes flattering, sometimes, well…not as flattering.
Dilemma
One of Nelly's biggest dilemmas might as well be why his video for "Dilemma" is so damn inconsistent. Fortunately, most of it is vague, but here's something (feel free to sing along):I met this chick and she just moved right up the block from me
And she got the hots for me, the finest thing my hood done seen
But oh no, oh no, she gotta a man
And a son, but that's okay
Cause I, wait for my cue and just listen, play my position
Like a shortstop, pick up everything mami hittin'
And in no time I
I plan to make this one mine.But did Kelly move up the block, or was she across the street all along? Does she really have a son, who is mysteriously absent from the video (maybe he's there, they just forgot to unpack him from the U-Haul)? If Nelly's waiting for his cue, why does he show up with a different girl at the end of the video? And why is Patti Labelle playing Kelly Rowland's mother?
Besides consistency, there's also a lack of good editing.
For instance, Kelly and Nelly are shown flirting throughout the video, until Nelly walks by Kelly with a new woman. Kelly proceeds to give Nelly the stink-eye (what is up with her blue eye shadow?) She also manages to, in several minutes, swallow all the free air in the world with her open mouth. Later, Nelly and Kelly are seen dancing on the street. What? When did this happen? Did they make up off-camera, or is this before Kelly stole all our air? And why is Patti Labelle calling her daughter back inside? And why the heck are they dancing in front of the Kelly's house, up the block (i.e. across the street) from Nelly's house?
These are just some of the world's greatest mysteries. ¤ C.Ho.
Video Review: Sexy or Skanky?
Might be time to lock up your kids - videos are getting more and more risqué…or are they? Take a look at some of the videos that are on heavy airplay over at MTV and its Canuck sister, Much Music.0 - Doesn't register a pulse
1 - Sexy
2 - Too many gratuitous booty shots
3 - Rated R
4 - Might give you genital herpes
5 - Skankier than my ex-boyfriendNivea featuring Jagged Edge, "Don't Mess With My Man"
What You See: Scantily-clad dancers, expensive cars.
Rating: 0
Mariah Carey, "Through the Rain"
What You See: Thankfully, very little of Mariah Carey's boobs, unlike her other videos (see left). Waaaay toned down.
Rating: 0Missy Elliott, "Work It"
What You See: A slimmer Missy, still crazy after losing all those calories. Little kids breakdancing.
Rating: 0LL Cool J, "Luv You Better"
What You See: LL Cool J's perfect, Adonis body, sculpted to perfection. Also: some other things.
Rating: 1Justin Timberlake, "Like I Love You"
What You See: Dancing, dancing, and then Justin trying to mack.
Rating: 1Sean Paul, "Gimme The Light"
What You See: Sean Paul, some dancers wearing tight clothes, Sean Paul.
Rating: 1Eminem, "Lose Yourself"
What You See: Clips from 8 Miles, Eminem doing his thing, some more clips of 8 Mile. No clips of Brittany Murphy.
Rating: 1 (for Eminem's mere presence - would have been a 4 if they had thrown in some clips of Brittany Murphy).Ja Rule featuring Bobby Brown, "Thug Lovin'"
What You See: As if Ja Rule wasn't offensive enough, now you've got Mr. Whitney Houston, who hasn't been a thug in decades. The newest "prince of R&B and hip hop?" Hardly.
Rating: 2Clipse, "When The Last Time"
What You See: Lots of , er, "loose"-lookin' women, some of which are suspected to live in trailer parks.
Rating: 4, because of said "loose"-lookin' women.
Christina Aguilera featuring Redman, "Dirrty"
What You See: What don't you see? There's enough T&A there to feed a small country. Girl, put some clothes on.
Rating: 5+
