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Sex Toys 101:

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The basics to self-love...

X MARKS THE SPOT The coveted G-Spot is another Holy Grail of orgasms. It's situated at the front vaginal wall, approximately halfway between the vaginal opening and the cervix. When stimulated, this coin-sized spongy area can swell up above the vaginal wall's surface. Many people find it hard to orgasm all the time through the G-Spot. It varies from woman to woman whether it's a vaginal orgasm or a clitoral orgasm that does it for them. SOME CLEAN FUN In the bath, let a steady stream of warm water run over your clitoris. It's sure to get you going, if you know what I mean.

So, here I am writing about sex toys. I swear, Michelle and Phan dump the weirdest assignments on me. Actually, this time around I volunteered for the story. I was always curious about these little gadgets, and as a sex toy amateur myself, I delved into the forbidden world of dildos, vibrators, and masturbators to unearth the great mystery behind these often overlooked, blush-inducing toys. But no matter how conservative or kinky you are, sex toys are a great addition to any bedroom escapades. Whether alone or sharing with a friend, these are sure to enhance the experience.

Take a walk with me on the kinky side.

The Basics
When you think of sex toys, the first image that you conjure up is the "solo mission." While there are hundreds of products on the market for couples to share, most are designed to be used alone. Masturbation has a myriad of assets. For instance, it lets you learn more about your body and what gets you going. It has been proven that the more often you can orgasm, the more naturally it will come. And it has great health benefits as well.

Many women feel uncomfortable masturbating or feel too embarrassed to talk about it. But it's totally natural, and more people do it than you think. First things first, don't make it your mission to reach orgasm, as the added pressure is sure to kill the mood. As with sex, mood is very important. Start off in a comfortable, private place, like your bedroom or the shower. Relaxation is key. You can begin with caresses to "non-sexual" places, such as the neck or thighs. Slowly move to more intimate territory, like your nipples. Explore the vulva, your outer vaginal area. When you're ready, apply lubricant, and find the clitoris (this is the area where the vaginal inner lips part, at the top point where they divide, and will feel like a small protrusion the size of a pencil eraser). This is the Holy Grail of orgasms. Experiment with what strokes and pressures feel best, and add penetration with your fingers on your other hand if you like. Don't feel discouraged if you don't reach orgasm at first. The best part is that you get to try and try again.

The Pleasure Spots
For women: Sit on his lap, facing away from him, bending slightly forward. Or try doggy style, but have him lean completely forward, resting his body on your back. Both positions angle the penis to strike the G-Spot.

For men: Enhance his orgasm by stroking his perineum, a quarter-sized area of skin between the scrotum and anus. The prostate gland, situated beneath the perineum, will also make his orgasm more intense. It's internal, so more pressure is needed. His nipples and buttocks also contain nerve endings that will send shivers up his spine.

Some More Fun
If you're feeling a little sexy, try phone sex. It's very erotic and is sure to get him hot and bothered anticipating your next encounter. You don't have to be a phone sex operator to do this; all you need is a little imagination. Let your inhibitions go and tell him all the naughty things you'd love to do to him, and let him do the same. Don't think of it as a porn tryout, but more as a communication exercise for your lovemaking. Tell him all your fantasies, and don't be surprised when he rips off all your clothes next time he sees you. If you don't foresee phone sex in the near future, try sending out a sexy e-mail or leaving him a short and steamy phone message. Tell him you're not wearing underwear. It gets them every time.

Including role-play in the bedroom can also spice up your lovemaking. Again, a little imagination is all you need. It can be a very fun and erotic experience. You always wanted to be Scarlett O'Hara? Here's your chance to change the ending of Gone With the Wind, porn style. You can also take that extra step and invest in some "fetish" clothing. Check out your local adult store for some ideas, or dust off your old school uniform and hike up the skirt a couple of inches.

Also look into handcuffs or blindfolds. You don't have to be a dominatrix to use this stuff. Just make sure the handcuffs are comfortable to wear, and agree to stop if any of you are getting uncomfortable.

[ Sex toys to tickle your fancy. Part II of the article. ]