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Retro Fashion:
Celebrity style...
One of the perks of being a celebrity is that no matter what you wear, everyone will love you. That's not to say that you won't land yourself on Mr. Blackwell's Worst Dressed List, or that your peers won't stare at you in awe and wonder why your publicist lets you dress yourself, but it does help to explain numerous celebrity fashion faux pas. And if you're loved enough, people may even try to emulate your style. Let's take a look at some of the celebrities and films that helped inspired those trends we now shake our heads at in total befuddlement.G. I. Joe (circa 1964)
When I first got into hip-hop, I noticed that many artists wore army-inspired clothing. And when I tried to figure out who started this trend, I smacked my forehead and (after regaining consciousness) said, "Of course!" G. I. Joe was an action figurine that sported his army fatigues all the time. And then, about twenty years later, the trend finally caught on. For guys, it was all about the jackets, the pants, and the hats. For girls, the appeal was in the short skirts. These clothes also came in different colours - black, green, blue, maroon - so you knew you'd be styling and colour-coordinated. If only G. I. Joe were a real person…he'd s be so proud of his bad self.Charlie's Angels (circa 1976 - 1981)
Before Jennifer Aniston's hair became the focus of America, you had Farrah Fawcett and her massive head of blonde hair. The feathered, upturned 'do became a trademark of the 70's, and briefly made an appearance in the 90's. And the best part was that all it took was a hairdryer, curlers, enough hairspray to kill a layer of the ozone, and a portable fan to keep your hair blowing in the wind.The Dukes of Hazzard (circa 1979 - 1985)
Lil' Daisy Duke (Catherine Bach) helped inspire those itty-bitty shorts called, most befitting, Daisy Dukes. Girls went out in droves and bought them. They also dug in their closets and pulled out their old pair of jeans. Coffee stain on the seat? Grass-tarnished knees? Unidentified substance on the cuffs? No problem! Just whip out a pair of scissors and cut away. Bonus points if you can manage to let your ass cheeks hang out without letting your butt crack show.Brooke Shields (circa 1980)
Yay for Brooke Shields and her bushy eyebrows! Women everywhere threw away their tweezers and let it all grow out. When The Blue Lagoon came out, her eyebrows were the focus of fashion magazines across the world. Were they or weren't they real? Did she have them done? Why did she never appear to grow a unibrow? Were the eyebrows a front for the mob? And why was she canoodling on an island half-naked with her brother? Sadly, this trend didn't last too long, and once again, women (and some men) went back to waxing and plucking their hairs away.Flashdance (circa 1983)
As soon as this movie came out in the early 80's, legwarmers and off-the-shoulder sweatshirts became all the rage. What was once relegated to the hardcore gym-goers soon became a something that could be worn on the street without so much as an eye roll. The fact that Jennifer Lopez blatantly ripped off the movie in her music video for "I'm Glad" is a testament that the fashion from Flashdance is something best left to the movies and Richard Simmons.Madonna (circa 1983)
Every Hallowe'en, without fail, someone decides to dress up as "1980." And said outfit usually consists of dressing like Madonna, circa the 1980's, complete with torn stockings, big clunky earrings, and some sort of ballerina/goth dress. When "Like a Virgin" came out, a few brave souls even attempted to make wedding dresses part of their daily wardrobes. Madonna was trashy yet chic, slutty yet virginal, but at the end of the day, she still set fashion trends that will never be forgotten.Ghost (circa 1990)
Demi Moore's hair garnered as much attention as the movie when she cropped it all off to play Molly Jensen. Boyish yet feminine, her mushroom-inspired haircut had people running out to shed their 80's crimped hair. Fashion magazines told us how to get her cut, how to manage it, and how to style it. It was truly a new revolution in women's hairstyles. Short hair was sexy, and we didn't have to spend hours with our hot irons or hairdryers to get this look. Heck, we could even go to the barber to get our hair cut and save $50.Blossom (circa 1991 - 1995)
In retrospect, it seemed like Blossom wore the same thing day in and day out. It's almost as if she bought her clothes in bulk at the department stores. It was either a baby doll dress or a vest paired with Bedazzled jeans, topped off with a funky hat. But the girl had style for her time, and soon enough, baby doll dresses were worn by people who were neither babies nor dolls. This writer will admit to owning one or two in her lifetime, but nothing really panned out and so she burned them along with her copy of Hanging Tough.Kris Kross (circa 1992)
I've got to give them credit - they managed to sell albums and momentarily shock North America with their clothes-worn-backwards-for-no-particular-reason style. In the playground, kids everywhere turned their hats around, wore their jeans to their knees, and grabbed their Osh-Kosh overalls. You haven't been traumatized until you've seen twelve year olds walking around the baseball diamond with a pair of overalls worn backwards. It was a trip, and also something I wish to never see again for as long as I live.Billy Ray Cyrus (circa 1993)
Billy Ray was a relative unknown in the country music business until he released "Achy Breaky Heart." He revived country line dancing and the dreaded mullet. I know the mullet's been around for ages. Half the rock acts of the 80's had mullets. The New Kids on the Block had mullets. Even Salt'n'Pepa had femme-mullets. But this was the early 90's, and I thought mullets had been retired. Billy Ray wore his unabashedly and without apologies. It was magnificent in its sheer cheesiness. After a while, it grew a life of its own and swallowed him whole, hence his disappearance from the music industry shortly thereafter. (Afterthought: Hey, Pink has worn a mullet too. But she looks cute, and thankfully no one else has followed suit.) ¤ C.Ho.
[ Read on to see what Michelle sported back in the day. ]