Dear Angry Black Grrl:
Playa playa, overbearing brothers, curing the winter blues…



GOT A QUESTION?
ADVICE OF THE MONTH
Dear Angry Black Grrl,
I have been dating two men at the same time. They both know about each other, but one is starting to put the pressure on me to decide. I understand that it's only fair, but it's so hard to choose! They both make me happy, but in different ways. What is a girl to do!
C. R.

Playa, playa! They both know about each other? And they don't mind??? Girl, you need to teach a class! But truthfully, you might need to choose one man. If you're all just having fun then it's cool. But if one man has developed deep feelings for you, you need to let him know how you feel, so that you don't string him along and do more damage.

Girl, I know it must be fun dating two fine men, but don't be so damn greedy. Choose one!!

Dear Angry Black Grrl,
At a company party, I had a little too much to drink and became very sick. The next day at work, my boss started teasing me about it. I'm a good sport, so at first it was okay, but after a while it just became annoying. You don't see me complaining about his bad habits and I've never once commented on his toupee. I'm sure he thinks it's all fun and games, and I don't want him to think I can't take a joke. How do I get him to stop without compromising our relationship?
Company Lush

Girl, I gotta confess. The same thing happened to me about a year ago, and my co-workers still haven't stopped making fun of my cheap drunk antics.

But you might need to take the jokes for a while until he can get it out of his system. If a few months go by and he's still punkin' you, I suggest you run up on him and steal his toupee. Oh, you might want to clean out your desk while you're at it.

Dear Angry Black Grrl,
I have a very overprotective older brother. He's always been this way, but I find now that I'm reaching my twenties and need more freedom. He screens my calls, gives my dates a hard time, is not accepting of my friends (because they "keep me out at all hours") and basically wants to know my every move. I'm sick of this! Help!
R. W.

It's nice that your brother has your back, but he's acting like your father instead of your brother. You should try talking to him and ask him why he's all up in your business. But don't be confrontational - just ask him why he needs to know your every move. If he's trying to protect you from the dangers out there, than it's cool. But you should also inform him that you are getting older and you need your space. Don't hate him too much, he's just looking out for you.

Dear Angry Black Grrl,
A close friend of mine is the cheapest man you'll ever meet, and every Christmas I end up getting him something expensive while all I get is a lump of coal. I'm not putting a price tag on our friendship, but you know what I mean. I don't want to spend large sums of money on him is he's not going to reciprocate! But then I feel like Scrooge. Should I put his cheapness aside and get him something good, or take the low road and get him something cheap (but thoughtful)?
H. E.

Haven't you learned anything over the past few Christmases? If the man can't even spend a dime on you, you know that you shouldn't be dropping serious paper on him.

I know he's your friend and you want to give him something special, but maybe an expensive gift is not the way to go. Try something else - bake him some cookies, take him out for lunch, write him some poetry. They are beautiful and personal gifts that won't put you into debt.

Dear Angry Black Grrl,
What's the best cure for the winter blues?
Down in the Dumps

If you have the cash, I recommend that you take off and vacation in a hot, tropical island.

If you're like me and you don't have the cash to take off at the very moment, I suggest that you keep your mind off of winter and develop some hobbies. Maybe you can join a gym, take a night course at a local college or try your hand at painting. But my best suggestion to you is to try your hardest to save some money. Try putting some money away every couple of weeks. By the end of the winter season, you'll be ready to party it up in some exotic locale. ¤ Michelle